A long nine months.
Upheaval, loss, reconfiguration, hope. Searching, feigning, hiding, dealing.
To find a small shell on a local beach, to withdraw from it its reality as though it was sentient, to listen to its experiences; the steady, comforting ebb and flow of a calm tide, the shock and suffocation of a high tide, the emptiness and desiccation of a low tide. Suffering the turbulence and confusion of a hurricane, enjoying the warmth and tentative hope of the sun's rays. Each independent piece adding to its being, to its growth.
This may be an apt depiction of the last few months.
Let me introduce to you, Nebel (pronounced "nah-belle" for those of you who, like me, thought it may sound more like rebel, or even naybel).
Nebel is a now 8 month old Australian Shepherd. She is from Ontario originally, but found herself living with a lovely young woman in Lunenburg, Nova Scotia. Nebel was supposed to find a place within her breeding program, but alas this little girl's teeth did not come in straight enough to be able to flaunt her other wonderful qualities in the show ring. Nebel was tentatively advertised for a new home.
I was tentatively seeking a canine partner-in-crime to share my days with, having been really feeling the void left by the loss of Journey. I came across a social media post and read about her.
Something clicked. I denied it to myself.
I made arrangements to meet this girl, with my husband and my sister.
I'm not sure what I was expecting; certainly not this calm, polite, wiggling black dog. This dog that immediately shimmied over to me, as though I was an old friend. This dog that layed her ears back on her head, and squinted her eyes at me in serene delight. This dog that, when I crouched down, leaned her head against me, put her muzzle close to my neck, and softly wiggled some more.
This dog that approached each of us similarly, in tranquil acknowledgement, as though to make sure we each felt uniquely greeted, and perhaps even conveying that we were each... known.
One week later, Nebel came to live with us.
I'd like to say that it has been an easy transition for both of us. We both have struggled. I missed Journey fiercely, surprising myself. Surely, the missing had to end?
Nebel, understandably, fiercely missed the seven other canines she grew up with, and her loving human family.
Clumsily, we have started this new stage of our lives. Carefully figuring each other out.
Me, trying not to fuck things up. Nebel, whole-heartedly embracing her life with me, with my family, with our dogs.
Everyone, meet Nebel, also known as Becen's Good for the Soul.